A Recap of Yesternight's Winning Convos

Last night wasn't anything special. But i took pleasure in a few particular conversations. In all reality, my brain is only functioning at 3% today, and repeating conversations seems like a good way to get another post up without much effort.



Set up: My couch
Breezy: Dude it would suck to be a girl and have a period.
Me: Seriously
Breezy: What's the traffic looking like on I-76
Me: Let me check....OK, her flow is looking pretty good.
Breezy: Gross

Set up: A group of us are in the outdoor area of the bar.
Daewoo: What beers are on special tonight?
Waitress: $3 miller lites and PBRs
Me: Wait, the bartender said it was $1 PBRs. Are you new here or something?
Waitress: That's just what they told me, I'm sorry.
10 minutes later
Breezy: What time is the incubus ticket giveaway?
Waitress: It's happening at midnight.
Me: Then why does it look like that radio guy is pulling out a name now?
Waitress: Oh..umm..yea..I guess they are doing it now
Me: Strike two
Usually after banter like this with a waitress it would be easy to get her number. But if her waitressing abilities are any indication of what kind of person she is, I want nothing to do with her or her number.

Radio Guy: Hey, I'm really sorry you guys didn't win the incubus tickets and the miller lite VIP passes in which you'd be able to consume as much beer as you liked. But here, have this SAW trilogy DVD.
Daewoo: Are you kidding me??

Set up: At the bar I strategically position myself next to a cute blonde. The bartender is making her mixed drinks.
Me: They always skimp on the liquor don't they.
Blondie: Yes! It's so annoying
Me: Why don't you just get beer?
Blondie: All they have for $1 is PBR but the only beer I drink is yuengling.
Me: You sound picky. Picky and cheap. But I like your choice in beer
Blondie: Well...uh...thanks. That's why I never go to frat parties...the beer is like water and the guys are just as tasteless.
Me: Yeeeeaaaaa

Set up: Daewoo and myself are sitting on my porch. A girl, hereby referred to as Dumb Girl, who had attempted to verbally harass us a few hours ago walks by.
Daewoo: Hey you, what are you looking at?!?!
Dumb Girl: Shut up!
Daewoo: Come up here
For some reason this girl actually listens and comes up to the porch.
Daewoo: Look at your sandals. What they heck are they. Are you trying to be Egyptian or something?
Dumb Girl: Ugh! You are such a racist.
She storms away.
Daewoo: What kind of racist am I?!?!